Housing Association tenants do it too, Jim.
"Hi Spikey, who do I talk to about number 33 not picking up dog poo?
Thanks,
Tracy"
It annoys me so much that they don't get a reply asking who they are and what street they are talking about until my 10 day turnaround time has passed.
Your real name is Spikey?!?!? :O
Cadburys Caramel bars. First time I've had one in years and ... where did all the chocolate go you grasping cunts?
The shrinkflation of the stagflation nation.
Say that 10 times fast.
Meal deal shrinkflation is where the real scandal is at the moment. Yoghurt as a main, truly I plead with you.
What are you getting as a snack in that situation? Some grains of rice?
Sainsburys remains king on that front.
The best Ham and Cheese sandwich in the game. A scotch egg, Chicken Satay or Crisps and you can get a large Red Bull as a drink. Phenomenal stuff.
Boots was always decent when I went there. I like Tesco's, their chicken and bacon sub is a weird thing but really addictive. It's the weird mayoey sauce they put in it.
I cracked a bit of my tooth off on a bit of seeded bread last night.
It's a molar that has a root canal ages ago, apparently they are prone to it. Still, what the fuck?
If it ain't those Ł5 loafs with rock crust, it'll be a hidden chicken bone that does mine. Always fear that as I've chipped one of my front ones and had it reconstructed with some shite that the dentist said would last about 2 years. That was 8 years ago
Didn’t have any tea so fancied ordering something. Wife wanted kebab so ordered one too. Can’t wait.
We're sorry, Euro Kebab. can't accept your order. You haven't been charged. Try ordering from somewhere else on Deliveroo.
Bastards.I’m just gonna make a butty instead, she’s having toast.
I'm a twit
Try not using Deliveroo.
But I get Plus or whatever free with Prime so delivery is free. Uber eats is definitely superior though.Originally Posted by Ben
I'm a twit
Do they not have their own website?
Went to big Tesco yesterday and pulled into a space at the edge of the car park. Some old bat a few spaces away had driven her car over the kerb into the hedge so that the front two wheels were up over the kerb. She was standing outside the car looking a bit shook up. I went over to see if she was okay and ask what had happened.
She'd thought she was in reverse and was about to back out but was actually in first and had gone up over the kerb into the hedge. She had tried reversing but it wouldn't come out. She gave me the keys and asked me to try but I had no luck either. I said she might need to call someone to get towed out. She rang her son in law but he lived about 20 miles away.
I went round the front of the car again to see what was stopping it being reversed out. Tried kicking/stamping down some of the thicker parts of the hedge that were in below the front bumper/panel and in around the wheels. Still nothing. Tried getting into the hedge and pushing it out. Still not budging. A couple of guys who were walking past then saw me trying to oush it and came to help. We eventually got it kind of rocking up the back of the kerb a bit and I said to keep going rocking it as we were building enough momentum to eventually get it up over the kerb. One of them was fucking useless and kept stopping saying it wasn't working while the other one kept going with rocking it. We eventually got it over the kerb and free.
One of them (the useful one) said to let it tick it over for a bit so I said to the old woman to sit there for five to ten minutes while I went into the shop. Came back out and told her to do a quick lap of the car park to make sure it was okay. She said it was grand so she'd be able to get home okay and off she went.
Well today I've got a fucking sore back. Lying on the sofa with deep heat on it now. Moral of the story - don't fucking try to help people.
You still done right.
Idk why that's so fucking funny but it is.
I was sure that was ending with the woman being killed crashing her broken car.
Or him fingering her around the back of the hedge
"Okay, try reverse now." As he's standing right behind the car.
Honestly not sure she should be driving.
That reverse/forward thing is common in the very old I think, it did for Richie Benaud.
Happened a couple months ago round here, thought he was hitting the brake and hit the accelerator killed 1 and severely injured 3. Didn't even get charged.
The fossils are a fucking nightmare on the road. Mandatory retests at a certain age need to become a thing.
Or go to the gym so that a miniscule amount of physical work does not wreck you.
Not sure how being jacked with a porridge brain helps matters.
Apparently Dementia is colloquially known as Diabetes type 3 by those in the know, such is the overlap between Dementia and Obesity.
So, yeah. Roid up these pensioner cunts and save Boydy's back.
I was very glad that both my parents voluntarily stopped driving as age and ill-health came to them. Must be a pain in the arse if you've got parents who are clearly past it but refuse to pack it in and you have to have the row with them about it.
They weren't even close on her gear layout though. First gear was top left, reverse was bottom right.
Doubt she started it in first gear and jumped forward enough to get up that kerb either.
Also, when the car was eventually free and she went for a lap of the car park and then set off, she was revving the fuck out of it. I think the burning clutch smell might just happen with her normal driving.
Burning rubber in the car park to make sure it still works.
There was no rubber burning, just the clutch. She set off about 5mph.
Could easily have been both of those.
I know, I mean they're just so confused they don't know what they've done. I'm sure all of us have done it at some point but we notice within 0.005 seconds and change, rather than ploughing on in a daze.
I did this when I was 16. Drove straight into the back of my neighbour's car driving my mum's car. Was a tad awkward.
Maybe I posted about it at the time, but someone I know was outside their work having a vape a couple of years ago, when a car went into first instead of reverse and pinned him to the wall. Amputation above the knee.
And they say vaping's safer.
I always think about this happening when I go behind parked cars that are close to a wall. Having heard that story I'm never going to do it again now.Maybe I posted about it at the time, but someone I know was outside their work having a vape a couple of years ago, when a car went into first instead of reverse and pinned him to the wall. Amputation above the knee.
Children bringing home plants from school.
May have just snapped the stem of a sunflower moving it into a bigger pot.
Wait what. At what age does that become a thing?
I'm a twit
Our reception and Y2 both do it.
No idea but I have been blighted by sunflowers since pre-school and now some sort of bean and load of as yet indeterminate leafed things have been added into the mix.
The leaves on the sunflower have gone mega limp in about 10 minutes.
Sunflowers are sold in shops right, like hamsters and Guinea pigs they “live forever”.
Tried that one year when I binned the seed but inadvertently bought dwarf sunflower seeds.
I've bet the farm on some electrical tape [apparently this can work] and cable ties.
Just get them one of these.
Smashed a glass and chipped the glass turntable plate in my microwave whilst making breakfast this morning.
Brilliant.
Been building a barbeque and near the end I realised on of the panels is on the wrong way round (the one where I attach the charcoal tray to so I'm guessing it would stop me from raising/lowering said tray) but two of the four screws attaching it will not budge at all.
Absolutely SEETHING.
Acetone and transmission fluid mixed will loosen anything. Assuming you’re not a geek and don’t have that lying around, heat it up then blast it with WD40.
Blasted with WD-40, left it for like an hour and then took a lighter to the screws. Came out easily after that.
Still haven't finished the BBQ due to sports on now, proper fiddly piece of shit.
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